Are Selfies the New Accessory?

 Has social media literally turned us into narcissistic and pretentious beings? Long gone are the simplistic days of rotary phones and getting someone’s phone number on a napkin or matchbook. What happened to the times when we actually enjoyed a moment without taking photos or videos of it on our phones? When did we become so self-absorbed that we need so much approval from others? We’re like parking meters that need to be validated. The 1980s were the best. Music was colorful, expressive, as were the clothes and outrageous fashions. If you were lucky enough to grow up in the 80s you know what I mean. Simple times. Great music. Wonderful hair that coiffed into ways that would seem impossible if it weren’t for glorious hair gel and hairspray. I remember my friends and I loved music, bands and going to concerts. Taking photos with each other was key, not of just ourselves modeling our favorite outfit. We didn’t care to make duck faces and wild poses while holding our camera to our face—way too close up. 

When I was growing up my friends and I rode our bikes outside and roller skated. We enjoyed the roller rink and had fun playing outside. Outside was like a big playground. Sure I have wonderful photos of my childhood and even as a teenager, but they are with family and friends. Sure, there’s the occasional photo of myself in some funny thing I’m doing, but it was for a good laugh. Mostly the photos were of me and my friends smiling. Today social media platforms are filled with selfies that are at best sometimes nauseating. We get it. You have a cell phone and know how to take a picture of yourself. Now we get to see your house, your clothes, your room, your many facial expressions that you’ve mastered, your favorite outfits, your favorite foods and the plate full of food that you just cooked, that we get to enjoy vicariously through your photos. Through selfies I can practically taste the sushi, sandwiches and luscious desserts that tempt my palette and tease my senses. I get to see your lipstick really close up, and for men, facial hair that is taken so close up, I can almost get splinters on the really prickly hairs.

I believe selfies cause narcissism and an extreme amount of vanity. It’s photos that say “Look at me,” and “Look how hot I think I look.” That’s the problem as well—selfies probably induce a false sense of hotness most times. Anybody can take a selfie, but most are silly, ridiculously lame and not interesting. It’s rare I see a creative photo of someone. What is it about taking pictures of ourselves has caused so much popularity? We had photographs before—so the concept is not really new. Is it just that you can capture yourself at any minute doing odd things that you think someone might want to see? “Here’s me eating a sandwich at 3 am.” Or “Here’s my morning hair. Don’t I look sexy?” I mean are these photos meant to be funny, cause jealousy, stir up entertainment for others or simply just something to do when bored? I’m not really a fan of taking selfies and if I take one, someone is usually in the photo with me. Why would I want to post a ton of pictures of my clothes, my outfits and food that I’ve made? Some of us are not as privileged or well off monetarily and these things could cause resentment or jealousy. I’m a fan of being humble about things. It’s never good to show off, be vain or narcissistic. I truly believe social media has brought about a need for so much approval of the self. If we don’t get a lot of likes on our page or a photo—this could cause upset or resentment issues. We may get insecure and feel not as liked as others who get lots of likes. We may feel like we don’t matter as much as someone else if we get overlooked or that what we say or sharing isn’t as important. This is a dangerous way to go about things. Sure, it’s fun to chat on social media, share ideas even have healthy debates. But, when we are dependent on likes on posts, statuses and selfies, we’re setting ourselves up to be letdown. I think it’s best to just share things that don’t seem like boasting or bragging about what we have. Sharing is different than self-promotion. This is just my opinion on how I feel social media has turned many of us into narcissists who rely on others to validate self-worth.

We should never forget the simple days like the 80s. Simple things like music, food, talking with friends, laughing, enjoying the moment, and singing to your favorite song—without having the need to video it and post it up on social media. Sometimes it’s fun to share those moments with others, but sometimes it’s nice to have moments just between you and your friends. There is a sacredness that feels pretty awesome when you are able to do that. There is something to be said for being humble and not needing to show off what you did all through the day. There is something to be said for enjoying things simply.